"one must imagine sisyphus happy"
the eternal struggle of life's purpose
“i exist. in thousands of agonies — i exist. i’m tormented on the rack — but i exist! though i sit alone in a pillar — i exist! i see the sun, and if i don’t see the sun, i know it’s there. and there’s a whole life in that, in knowing that the sun is there.”
— Fyodor Dostoyevsky, The Brothers Karamazov
humanity has one eternal struggle: it is the absurdity of life, the constant need to find a life’s purpose but it seeming so unattainable and sometimes useless.
the french-algerian philosopher albert camus wrote extensively about the concept of absurdity in life. he believed that human beings strive to find meaning in their existence, but ultimately fail because life has no inherent purpose or meaning.
camus argued that there are three ways that individuals can respond to this realization: suicide, philosophical suicide, or acceptance. the first two responses involve rejecting the reality of absurdity, while the third involves embracing it.
in the first stage, a person becomes overwhelmed by the realization that life has no inherent meaning and may feel that their existence is pointless, which can lead to feelings of despair and the belief that there is no reason to continue living, resulting in suicide.
in the second stage, a person tries to avoid confronting the reality of absurdity by clinging onto beliefs or distractions that offer the illusion of meaning. camus referred to this as "philosophical suicide" because it involves accepting a belief system or ideology that provides a false sense of purpose.
the third and last stage involves accepting the absurdity of life and embracing the freedom that comes with it. according to camus, individuals who reach this stage become "absurd heroes" who create their own meaning in life and live in a state of constant rebellion against the inherent meaninglessness of existence.
thinking about this topic always makes me think of a movie i really enjoyed. in "soul," the main character, joe, is a musician who believes that his purpose in life is to play jazz. but when he dies and ends up in the afterlife, he realizes that he has been so focused on achieving his dreams that he has not really lived his life to the fullest.
the movie "soul" and albert camus' philosophy of the absurdity of life share a common theme: the search for meaning and purpose in life.
both "soul" and camus' philosophy explore the idea that individuals must find their own meaning and purpose in life, rather than relying on external factors to provide it for them. they both highlight the importance of living in the present moment and finding joy in everyday experiences, rather than constantly searching for something outside of oneself.
i remember the movie’s message kind of being “what if you don’t have a life purpose or a specific reason to be on earth? what if you don’t necessarily have to contribute something to society? what if life and ‘finding your spark’ is just about finding what simple pleasures you enjoy and that being your purpose?
“should i kill myself or have a cup of coffee?” is not actually a quote by camus, as much as people on social media like to spread it and believe. the origin of the line seems to be from barry schwartz’s book ‘the paradox of choice’, even he does not provide a source for the exact quote. but i think the quote is a good example for the understanding of absurdism and it aligns with camus’ philosophy.
in a holistic sense, the small actions that define our lives may seem insignificant when compared to the prospect of ending it all. this question, rooted in nihilism, suggests that our existence is as fleeting as the enjoyment of a cup of coffee. yet, it also poses an existential dilemma - if life is absurd and devoid of meaning, what's to stop us from choosing to end it all?
while this decision is a complex one that should never be taken lightly, finding joy and meaning in simple pleasures such as a cup of coffee can offer a sense of comfort and purpose amidst life's chaos and uncertainty.
“i hope you will listen to a certain overlooked and different voice within you. because the human heart, even when it wants to die, quite often wants at the same time to eat some tteokbokki, too.”
— baek se-hee, i want to die but i want to eat tteokbokki
the book "i want to die but i want to eat tteokbokki" and albert camus' philosophy of the absurdity of life share a common theme of existentialism.
the protagonist in the book is struggling with the existential crisis of feeling lost and purposeless in life. she contemplates suicide but finds comfort in the pleasure of eating tteokbokki, a korean snack that brings her happiness and a sense of meaning (literally me with coffee but okay).
sometimes i feel like reading too much into nihilistic and absurdist philosophy makes me go a little more insane and lost but at the same time they provide so many valuable insights into the human condition of searching for meaning and purpose in a seemingly meaningless world. they offer a sense of liberation for people who can embrace the absurd and find their own “spark”.
i’m grateful for the works of philosophers like albert camus, authors like baek se-hee and movies like “soul” that challenge us to confront the inherent contradictions and uncertainties of our existence, and to live fully despite them.
every day i exist i want to find at least some beauty and some joy in the most absurd of circumstances, whether that is a good prayer, a cup of coffee, a text, a sound or an exploration of a new book for me.
“what i need to practice from now on is to stop trapping myself in the same formula of, 'this is what I have to be doing,' and to simply acknowledge the fact that i am an independent individual.”
― baek se-hee, i want to die but i want to eat tteokbokki